What Happens In the Pool Stays In the Pool
by Sambi H2O Polo
Summary: Cloud is an aspiring young water polo player who just found out that not only did he have to transfer schools but he was also too old to remain on his club team. But enough about that, this story is about WET men, SPEEDOS, and BIG YELLOW BALLS. CxL AxR
1. Prologue

**WHIP-SIP: anogram What Happens In the Pool Stays In the Pool ( this is the unwritten law of water polo)**

**Co-Authors' Notes:** This is a collaboration between Sambi H2O Polo and RinRan.

Sambi: Yay we wrote a story together! :D

RinRan: It's like we made a baby or something. Yeah... XD

(...We're both girls. Stop with that face! Geez, you perverts...)

Sambi: Just for all of you who don't know...Water Polo kicks ass.

RinRan: Gasp! Sambi-you've just CUSSED! (cue dramatic effects)

Sambi: Yes, yes I did...your point?

RinRan: ...Whose point? Anyways, enjoy your crappy video game fanfic.

Sambi: HEY! It is not crappy.

**Disclaimer:** We do not own any characters used in this fic. We only own anything water polo related and anything else that our crazy minds have created.

* * *

**Prologue**

* * *

"Twilight Town High?"

A young woman in her 20s stared at the transfer form in her hand. Her face and general appearance had a wipeout look, despite not having reached her prime. Such was the fate of being a high school counselor. She looked up languidly at the teen before her.

Today's case was Cloud Strife, a junior and straight A's student. His cornflake blond hair was spiked up to one side, a fashion popular among boys of his age and prettiness. He stands 5'7 with bright blue eyes and a well-toned body, visible under the school's black polo shirt and tight pants. If she was just a few years younger with energy to spare, this counselor would find some way to kidnap this God's Gift to Women and keep him for herself. Unfortunately, Cloud here had just recently turned seventeen, as his birth date had shown in bold lettering on his file.

"Um...yeah," the teen muttered, shuffling one foot behind the other in a shy manner. Apparently he's also the antisocial type (or so she assumed), which made him so much cuter in his reactions to dealing with women or strangers. The counselor shook this thought away-back to business. "We're moving as soon as school let out to the other side of town, in a different district. So my mom sent me to here to ask for a transfer, since I won't be able to come here any more, at least, according to the school board, right?"

"Yes, and it certainly is a shame," the counselor said, nodding her head in sympathy. "You only have one more year left and having to move to a different school is completely unfair. Don't worry though-your credits will transfer, so at least you won't have to start from scratch to reach criteria," she added. A look of relief appeared on Cloud's face. "But...why Twilight Town High, might I ask?"

Cloud slightly winced-he was afraid she might ask something like that. Where he lives, three high schools dominate. The largest and also the lone private school is Hallow Bastion, which is the one he's currently enrolled in. Then there's the rival school, Twilight Town, which is a public school. The two schools compete in practically everything, from academics to sports to even community service! Finally, there's Traverse Town, but it was more of a neutral school and thus no one really care.

School pride is a big thing between the two. No Heartless (what students who go to Hallow Bastion refer to themselves as) would ever any were near a Nobody (what students who go to Twilight Town refer to themselves as) and vice versa. If a group of Heartless passes a group of Nobodies, it is common courtesy for them to engage in a brief battle of name calling and humiliations. There are no reports of gang activities between the two schools; the closest it ever came to a gang fight was the homecoming game between the Raging Heartless and the Fighting Nobodies.

"...I wanted to play a certain sport," mumbled Cloud, shifting his weight again. The counselor stared and then smiled.

"Oh? And what sport is that?" she asked as she signed the transfer forms before handing them back to him.

Cloud took them and grinned. "Water polo," he replied.

"Ah, I see," she smiled back, not seeing at all. Not that tall, blond, and gorgeous needed to know that, however...

The two firmly shook hands in farewell, all the while exchanging brief advice and wishings of good luck. Cloud smiled his small, embarrassed smile and quickly left the office. The door could be heard shutting with a click and three seconds after that a loud whoop of joy was heard. The counselor shook her head, brunette locks swaying about in the air. She regretted not memorizing his home number when she had the chance to. "I'm gonna miss that boy, even if he is still underage," she quietly said to herself, giggling softly. She turned back to the paperwork that still needed to be finished and went through it, humming to herself as she did so.

TO BE CONTINUED . . .

* * *

OMAKE (After Thought):

Ten minutes went by when something in her head clicked. She looked up from her work, confusion obvious in her green eyes. "Water polo, huh," she murmured, scratching her head. "But...Twilight Town doesn't have water polo in their curriculum."

* * *

**Co-Authors' (End) Notes:**

Sambi: DUN DUN DUN... What's gonna happen next?

RinRan: Next time, on Dragon Ball-...I mean, WHIP-SIP. Stay tune! XD


	2. Beginning of a Beautiful, yet Gay, Story

**Co-Authors Notes:** The story actually begins...

RinRan: Alright! This party's getting crazy!

Sambi: Party? What party? This is only the first chapter...

RinRan: ... (holds up bottle of ginger ale)

Sambi: ... Whooho party! Now give me that soda. (tackles and runs away with) Ha ha ha it's all mine!

* * *

**Chapter 1 : The Beginning of a Beautiful, yet Gay, Story**

* * *

It was the first day of school. Like any normal teenager, Cloud was dreading this day. However, unlike most normal teenagers, it was not because it was the first day of high school; it was the first day of his senior year, and at a new high school to boot. Not to mention that this 'new high school' just so happened to be the cross-town rival of his old high school. It was the very same high school that he had spent the last three years mocking, taunting, and just all around hating.

However, it also happened to be the only high school in the district to have a swimming pool, and Cloud, as you must know, had always dreamt of playing high school water polo-

-Especially since over the summer he found out that he was over the age limit at his old water polo club.

So now Cloud, putting aside his years of hatred, reluctantly got ready to go to school. He grunted a farewell to his mother and trudged off to the train station, hoping to dear God that he wouldn't run into any of his old friends.

So far, so good. Now, safely at school, he hoped that he could get through the day without too much incident. As he walked through the double gates of Twilight Town High School, Cloud followed the crowd of students heading to pick up their schedules. Upon receiving his, he quickly scanned the familiar classes next to unfamiliar names and sighed before memorizing where he was due for first period. It was...AP Calculus.

"Crap," he thought for the millionth time that morning as he climbed up three flights of stairs. Already he hated this school, and first period hadn't even started yet! Fortunately, when Cloud entered the classroom, he was the first one there. Seeing as this was his chance to make himself unknown, he quietly took the furthest seat in the back row without bothering to greet the teacher. Not that the guy would have noticed, sitting in his big, comfy-looking office chair with his back to the rest of the room. Cloud sighed and studied his schedule again, all the while waiting for the bell to ring so that he could get on with his class and eventually his life.

"Let's see...first AP Calc., second AP Literature...third AP Chemistry, fourth AP Government/ AP Economy, fifth AP Psychology..." Yes, Cloud just so happen to be one of those students who somehow found the need to take as many college preparatory classes, even if meant sacrificing those precious moments of freedom that came with being a senior. Apparently, it didn't occur to him that he was, in fact, a senior and that he was entitled to as much fun and socializing time as the next guy. "And finally, sixth period...empty." Cloud then smiled to himself. "But not for long..." Nope, that's just how he was: a masochist.

While he sat there fantasizing about his soon-to-be sixth period, the rest of the class filed in. The bell rang, signaling school to begin. Cloud was oblivious to all of this until he heard an eerily familiar voice and a loud:

"_GOOOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING, T. T. HIGH!! __I'M TIDUS NELSON AND THIS IS YOUR ANSEM REPORT FOR THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!"_

_Thank you, Captain Obvious_, our blond hero thought as he shifted nervously in his seat, fearing what was to come out of the speakers next. He had hoped that his new school year would start quietly, with no one caring about him at all-

"_Attention, folks! Before we start the actual bulletin, I, Tidus Nelson, would like to give a LOUD SHOUT OUT-"_

-Unfortunately, this wasn't the case.

"_-to a particular student that had __RECENTLY TRANSFERRED to Twilight Town High for his senior year! I mean, who the hell does that?-"_

"_Tidus__!"_ growled a new voice on the speakers, interrupting Tidus' voice. All the students snickered at the deep, somber voice of the school's principal, Ansem the Wise (actual title). Cloud merely groaned and rested his forehead against the desk.

Tidus laughed nervously. _"Eheh, sorry Mr. Ansem the Wise, sir. Well, anyways...I would like everyone to welcome this guy –evenifhedidcomefromHallowBastion- if you see him! He's got blond spiky hair, he's got blue eyes, he's got a BIIIIIIIG-"_

"_Tidus, I'm warning you..."_

"_I swear-I didn't mean it in THAT sense! And he's one of my bestest best buddies; let's give it up for CLOUD FUCKING STRIFE!!"_

"_TIDUS!!"_

"_Meep! And now on to the bulletin read by the new ASB president ya'll choose last year-except for Cloud 'cause he wasn't here -who also happens to be my girlfriend, Yuna Moonchild-love ya honey- while I go and run my ass off from the principal-bye!"_

A girl's voice blared out from the speaker, trying hard to keep from laughing. _"Thank you, Tidus. Now, to all students with last year's debt: please report to the finance window immediately after first period or else-"_

In his first class, Cloud could feel 20-maybe 30- pairs of eyes fixed on him. He lifted up his head, gave everyone a good glare, and slammed his forehead against the desk with a loud bam. _I'm gonna kill that bastard_, he made a mental note. Meanwhile, everyone else exchanged glances with one another, while the bulletin finished with a loud feedback.

Suddenly, the teacher's chair swung around, revealing him to the class for the first time. He beamed at the class and sprung to his feet, exclaiming, "A-hyuck, let's get this show on the road!"

Yes, school had officially started.

-- : : : --

As usual, school moves by pretty fast when you're a senior. One minute, you are in an embarrassing situation during first period, and the next, it's suddenly lunch time. However, the embarrassing situation remains, and in this case, deepens.

"Hey, you see him?"

"Who?"

"The blond guy-you know, with the Chocobo hair style?"

"Oh, riiiiiiiiiight...Him! From Hallow Bastion!"

Cloud groaned inwardly and slammed his head against the table. Even after four hours people were still treating him like some sort of freak show. He could hear them as he walked through the halls, to and from classes, and into the cafeteria, whispering and giggling behind his back. Every time he lifted up his head from the table, someone always whispered something along the lines of "Heartless", and sent him back into withdrawal.

"At this rate I'm never going to eat lunch," Cloud moaned quietly into the sticky wooden surface of the table.

"At this rate, you won't even last the first week of school, let alone the whole year," a new voice piped up smugly.

Cloud tore his face from the table and stared wide-eyed at the person seated next to him.

The person just smirked and stared right back.

The two then proceed to engage in a two minute staring contest.

"Uh...who exactly are you?" Cloud ask, his right eye starting to twitch.

The other person smirked again, his green eyes remaining still and cat-like. He leaned in towards the blond. "More importantly, sweetheart, WHO are YOU?" he whispered seductively.

Cloud leaned back violently, almost knocking into a student behind him. However, he never took his eyes of the newcomer, in fear of losing the technically unofficial staring contest. "'Sweetheart'?! Excuse me?!" he gasped as his face started to turn red.

"Hey, junior. Get lost and stop harassing my friend." A hand came from behind Cloud, grabbing his shoulder and pulling him back. Cloud yelped in surprise as he fell back and looked up into the grey-blue eyes of a familiar newcomer, beset by glasses and upon a sharp face framed by layered brown hair. Squall Leonhart, another senior, smiled in greeting before turning sharply to the other person. "Didn't you hear me, punk?" he muttered coldly.

The junior smiled and raised his hands in a show of good will. He then stood up and sauntered away, but not before giving the two seniors a flirtatious wink.

"Thanks, man," Cloud muttered as his seat was pushed back up to normal. His friend took the empty seat next to him and sat down. "Hey, Squall...who the hell was that?"

"Casanova," Squall replied. He smiled upon seeing the confused look on the blond's face and explained, "To be honest, I don't really know his name. Didn't care or bother to find out, since he's one grade below us. But make sure to stay clear of him-he's known as Casanova by the girls AND guys at school for a reason."

"...Twilight Town's pretty open-minded, huh?"

"As a public school, it's pretty relaxed in terms of discipline and views. I believe there's a word for it-liberal."

Cloud chuckled and smiled. "That's good to hear. If guys like 'Casanova' there existed at Hallow Bastion, he would've been kicked out without a second thought."

Squall smiled back softly. "Hallow Bastion's that strict? Man, you're a nutcase for going there in the first place."

As the two continued to catch up, let us take a moment to study Squall Leonhart and his relationship to our blond hero (thus clearing up this WTF moment).

A senior as well, Squall attended Twilight Town High for all four years of high school. From his looks, one would assume he was intelligent as well as athletic. We are proud to say that this was the case; he is top of his class and he has been on the same club water polo team as Cloud since they were little. However, belying that cool exterior lurks a deep, dark secret. A secret so secretive that not even he knew about it yet-for now...

Now let's go back to the conversation at hand. Squall now arrives at the question that had plagued everyone's mind: "So, why did you transfer here anyways? Well, not that I'm complaining or anything, you know."

Cloud laughed sheepishly. "Well, technically it's because my family moved to this school district, but...I wanted to join the polo team here."

"...But what about our club team? You were still going to that during summer..."

Again the blond sheepishly laughed. "Yeah, about that...It turns out that it is only for sixteen and under. So...yeah."

Now Squall, previously unaware of this information, has to deal with a major reality check. He momentarily lost his composure and grabbed Cloud by the front of his shirt, bringing him close. "Why the hell didn't you tell me this earlier?!" he growled.

The blond looked away. "I...well...I...Hey, Tidus!"

Squall stared at him in confusion. "No, Cloud, I'm not Tidus, I'm L-" He was then cut off by a sudden weight on his back and two sun-tanned arms choking him in a bear hug. "Ack. Oh...H-Hi, Ti-dus..."

"Hey Cloud!" chirped Tidus, another senior and long time friend of the two. This suntanned blond with soft baby blue eyes and a constant happy smile was also the announcer from the morning bulletin, and thus the source Cloud's awkward embarrassment for the day. "Hey Squall! Lookin' lively, you two!"

"It's-Leon," gasped Squall-now-known-as-Leon. "And let go-already..."

Tidus pouted. "But you always let Cloud call you that-"

"LET. GO."

"Fine..." The tanned blond let go with a hop and walked over to Cloud with a grin. "So, you heard my welcome speech on the intercom this morning? Bet you're the talk of the whole school now."

"Yeah," Cloud muttered. He caught the glance of passing students whispering and sighed, "Yep, though I can't say it's a good thing." He yelped in surprise when Tidus suddenly gave him a hearty slap on his back.

"It's okay; you don't have to thank me."

"...Who said I was going to?"

"Jerk!" cried Tidus overdramatically. He then playfully punched Cloud in the arm and sighed. "So, what's up you two?"

Leon gave a cough and smoothed out his hair, saying as he did so, "Cloud's quitting club. That's why he transferred here, hoping to play polo with us since his old school didn't have a pool."

Tidus nodded understandingly. "I see..." He then frowned. "Uh...Cloud?"

"What?" asked the blond.

"...We don't have a water polo team here."

"...But...But...My counselor said-" Cloud paused and thought back to his conversation with Ms. Gainsborough. He thought and thought until he couldn't think any more. "Huh. I don't remember what my counselor said." His friends merely smiled; they were already used to this side of Cloud. "So, what do I do then?"

Leon shrugged. "You could always join the swim team," he paused at the murderous look on Cloud's face. "Or...not. Then there isn't much you could do."

"Wait. I have an idea," piped up Tidus. "I've been thinking about this for the past three years, but never really followed through with it. Cloud's entering our school must be a sign that this was meant to be!" He struck up his fist and posed dramatically. He stared at them both expectantly for a while, but Cloud merely reacted in confusion and Leon simply adjusted his glasses, so he gave up and continued on, "So, I'm thinking of petitioning for the start of a water polo team. Anyone up for it?"

"Wait-what?" asked Leon, his eyes widening. "You can actually do that?"

Tidus grinned cheerfully. "I'm the ASB spirit commissioner and the ASB president's boyfriend-I can do anything. Heck, I get to say who lives and who dies...figuratively speaking, of course."

"Start our own team," mused Cloud. He smiled and patted Tidus' shoulder. "I like that idea. Let's go, let's go, let's go!" With that he quickly grabbed his stuff and headed out the cafeteria, not worrying anymore about the strange looks he was getting or the whisperings behind his back.

Leon and Tidus stared after him. "Do you think he knows where the sport administration office is?" asked the brunet.

"I always thought this sort of thing had to be discussed with the principal," replied the tanned blond.

"You're in ASB. Shouldn't you know about this sort of thing?"

"Well, look who's talking, Mr. Fourth Year."

"...Tidus, you're a senior too."

"...Right," sighed Tidus. "I guess this is where our lunch ends." He waited for Leon to grab his things and together they headed out of the cafeteria into the sunlight.

Leon smiled softly. "And where our story begins. If anyone could create and lead a new water polo team, it would have to be Cloud."

_He's the only one __with the passion to do it-_

TO BE CONTINUED . . .

* * *

OMAKE (After Thought):

As they walked around the quad, trying to locate their spiky haired blond friend, a thought occurred to Tidus. "So, just why is it that Cloud's quitting club?" he asked Leon.

The brunet adjusted his glasses. "He said something about not being able to play due to being too old. Turns out our club is sixteen and under, and you know that Cloud had his birthday over summer."

"Oh," Tidus nodded, "so that's why." The two walked in silence, until Tidus interrupted again, "But wait-how the hell are WE still doing club? I guess I was okay since it was only for summer and I'm turning 17 in December, but what about you? Weren't you 17 since spring?"

Leon stopped and gaze thoughtfully up at the sky. Tidus stopped beside him and waited impatiently for an answer. "Hey, Leon! Are you there?" The shorter teen smirked. "You probably lied about your age, didn't you?"

"...You know...I didn't eat lunch today."

_So he DID lie_, thought Tidus with a bow of his head._ I can't believe I looked up to this guy for moral guidance._

* * *

**Co-Authors (End) Notes:**

Sambi: YAY! Chapter 1 is up. Now for the creation of the team.

RinRan: Hooray indeed. There's gonna be so much to do-finding a coach, finding members, designing the team Speedos-

Sambi: (Sticks tongue out) Kill joy.

RinRan: Hey! Anyways...when's Axel gonna show up? Can't have just Cloud as the center of attention now, can we?

Sambi: Oh, he'll pop up soon enough... Oh and just to clear up any misconceptions, this is not an Axel/Cloud fic. They're just both the main characters.

RinRan: ...Though there WILL be a little bit of Axel/Cloud fluff now and then. XD

Sambi: Yeah that and Axel/Tidus; Axel/Demyx; Axel/Seifer-

RinRan: HEY! No giving anything away! (coughAxelCidcough) Oh well, see ya'll soon! And review please!

Sambi: NOOO! Why'd you say that?! Now they're never gonna review...

RinRan: ...damn...


	3. What Can We Do You For?

**Co-Authors' Notes:**

Sambi: So sorry for the delay, I had college orientation, just in case anyone cares as to why the update took so long.

RinRan: Who cares? Man does not control fate, but he could fight against it...

Sambi: What the heck does that have to do with the price of peas in Persopolis?

RinRan: ...Your mom.

Sambi: ...Anyways, we have numerous pop culture references in this chapter and whoever can find them all, or at least all the ones we intentionaly put in there, they get-

RinRan: A GIANT ROCK.

Sambi: Oh my God, a giant rock!!

RinRan: ...That one doesn't count. Just kidding, you'll get...A COOKIE! At least until we can think of something better...

* * *

**Chapter 2 : What Can We Do You For? **

* * *

The room of the principal's office was an oval one. As you walk in, directly in front of you-other than the principal's desk, chair, and the principal himself-is a giant talking/singing bass. You know the one. To the left, a giant computer, like the one you see in really old 80s sci-fi movies, sits against the wall, ancient and covered in a thick layer of dust. To the right, a giant bookcase covers the wall, filled with books, old and tattered from years of constant use.

But enough about the room. It is here, during sixth period-which amazingly all of them had open, that our blond senior protagonists and his two friends came to petition for the starting of the schools very own water polo team.

Why water polo? Because they can, aka the plot.

"So...Mr. Nelson, Mr. Leonhart...Mr. Strife," Ansem the Wise paused deliberately at Cloud's name, causing him to cringe in fear, "What can I do you for today?"

The three stared at one another in silence for a while, comprehending the question. Finally, Leon cleared his throat and spoke up, "We're here to petition for the start of a water polo team, Mr. Ansem the Wise, sir."

Ansem the Wise nodded. "I see," he said, not seeing it at all. He stroked his beard in thoughtfulness before finally saying, "So, what IS this water polo you speak of?"

Yes, belying that grand, wise exterior lays a mind currently at the first stage of Alzheimer's.

Cloud raised his hand, trying to resist the urge to drag it down his face. "Um, it's a sport, uh, sir. Played in the water."

"It started in the late 19th century as a demonstration of strength and swimming skill-mmmmhmhmh mhmhm mhhm!" added Tidus, but was quickly silenced by Leon's hand over his mouth. Cloud looked at them both weirdly for a moment before returning his attention to the principal.

"Anyways, it's a team water sport, which can best be described as a combination of swimming, football, basketball, rugby and wrestling."

"Ah," murmured the principal with a nod. "That makes sense." He paused and thought for a moment. "...What were we talking about again?" he asked suddenly.

Leon sighed. "Sir, just sign the form allowing us to create the damn team already," he said through gritted teeth; Cloud and Tidus both stepped back, knowing how violent the normally passive brunet can get when angry.

Ansem the Wise stared at the paper in thought before finally saying, "Okay, I'll sign it."

"Yes!" the three seniors cheered.

"But you DO know that you'll have to talk to the sport administrator to start a team. He has the real power in that department."

"No!" the three seniors cried.

"Well, it's been nice chatting with you boys," beamed the principal. "Now get the hell out of my office."

--:--

"Now what do we do?" moaned Tidus. He then yelped in pain as a hand connected with the back of his head. "Owee! Squally! What cha do that for?!"

"That's for being an idiot," hissed Leon, readying his hand for another Leon bitch-slap™. "Weren't you paying attention back there? We have to go talk to the sport administrator..." He then slapped him again. "And that's for calling me 'Squall'-it's LEON!"

Tidus sniffed. "I said 'Squall-Y', not 'Squall'."

The brunet stared at him. "Do you WANT to get slapped again?"

"Please don't put me back in the box," the blond whimpered.

Both Cloud and Leon stared at their strange friend before mutually agreeing in their minds, "Yes, he watched WAY too much Youtube," and decided to ignore him for the rest of the day.

The three sat in silence for a while. Cloud scratched his gravity-defying spiky hair. "So...Squall, where is the sports administrator's office?"

"Oh, over by the pool, next to the gym," Leon replied. He ignored Tidus' look of rage and accusatory pointing at Cloud.

Cloud looked at Tidus' antics for a second before turning back to the brunet, asking, "So, then, if you know where his office is, why exactly are we just sitting here?"

The brunet pondered the question for a bit before finally responding, "Good question." He then stood up and said, "Let's go."

"Let's mosey," agreed Cloud, following suit. "Come on, Tidus." Tidus grudgingly followed, still irked about the whole 'Leon/Squall' affair.

--:--

Li Shang, former captain of the Imperial army back on his home world, stood watchful over his beloved Twilight Town High football field as if it was his own personal training grounds. As he watched the football team practice, pushing themselves to the extent of their physical abilities, he was hit by a wave of nostalgia as he reminisced about the times he spent training his soldiers, trying to make men out of them. Even if one was a girl.

_Ah, the good old days_, he thought, smiling as he watched his better half-the only one to best him-turn those good-for-nothing teenagers into the best bunch of Nobodies this program has ever seen. Even if she was a girl...

_Now THAT'S a girl worth fighting for, if you know what I mean_, he thought.

Someone tapped his shoulder, interrupting his thoughts before they could get too out of hand. Shang turned around to face the interlopers. He observed them, raising his eyebrow at their surprisingly fit physiques, and asked, "What can I do you for?"

_What the hell_, the three seniors thought. _Do all the administrators at this school say that, or are they all just pedophiles?_

Cloud coughed and gestured to the paper in Leon's hand, "Well, we just wanted you to, uh...so we can start a-"

"We want you to sign this paper so that we can finally start a kick-ass water polo team at this fucking school," interrupted Tidus with a smile. "Please."

"O-kay...Sure," replied Shang, taking the paper.

The three seniors stared at him in bewilderment. "...That's it?" asked Cloud.

"That's it. On one condition."

"What's the condition?" asked Leon.

"I'm not gonna tell you."

"Then it's no deal," replied Tidus firmly, earning slaps to the head from both his friends.

"The guy's offering to allow us to have a water polo team!" hissed Cloud.

"Well, yeah, but there's a catch!" hissed Tidus back.

"Who cares what the catch is? It's water polo!" interjected Leon. "It's our own high school team!"

"Not until I know what the catch is!" insisted Tidus.

"Fine," replied Shang. "The catch is--YOU HAVE CLIMB THE POLE TO GET THAT ARROW!" He pointed to the far end of the field, at the massive telephone pole-like pole with-surprisingly enough-an arrow stuck at the top. Cloud, Leon, and Tidus stared at the massive thing with wide-eyes. "WITH THESE WEIGHTS!" Shang then yelled, holding up two large, heavy-looking weights inscribed with Chinese characters. Cloud's, Leon's, and Tidus' mouths dropped at the sight of them.

Before the three could say anything about the task, a voice rose from the fields, screaming, "Shang! Are you trying to get the students to climb your stupid pole again?!"

"...But Sweetie, they want to start a new team!" he yelled back, blushing.

_Sweetie_, thought the three, mildly disturbed from that comment.

"Don't 'Sweetie' me! Let them start their stupid team!" screamed the voice back. "And climb your own stupid pole yourself!"

"Fine! Gimme a damn pen," grumbled Shang. He signed the paper and thrust it back to the three. He stared at them each in the eyes and leaned forward menacingly. "I'll make men out of you...yet. Now SCRAM."

"Uh...but Mr. Scary Athletic Direc-I mean, Shang, sir," squeaked Tidus. "What do we do about a coach?" He flinched back when Shang turned back to him.

"...What sport are you starting again?" he asked coldly.

"Water polo."

"Oh." The man looked up thoughtfully, before turning away. "Try Cid," he replied over his shoulder, and walked away.

"Uh...Thanks," Tidus said weakly. "Man, that guy was SCARY."

"You could say that again," replied Cloud.

"...Man, that guy was-"

"You don't have to though," Leon quickly said, cutting him off.

Tidus pouted and turned away. "Fine. Be that way." After a few seconds he spoke up again, "Hey, Leon...Who's Cid?"

Leon stared at him, his eye twitching. "How am I supposed to know? And why are you asking me anyways-you're the one in ASB! I should be the one asking you!"

Tidus laughed sheepishly, poking his index fingers together. "Eheh. I'm only spirit commissioner, I don't know the teachers."

"Auto teacher," murmured Cloud in thought. The other two turned to look at him, confused. He then held up his student planner. "Directory."

"Oh yeah, huh?" they replied. Tidus then grinned and thrust his fist into the air dramatically.

"OFF TO THE AUTO ROOM!" He then ran off, laughing maniacally. Leon and Cloud merely sighed and followed him, walking briskly at their own pace.

TO BE CONTINUED . . .

* * *

OMAKE (After Thought):

After thirty minutes of aimless wandering and Tidus-chasing, Cloud and Leon stopped in front of a random tall building with a giant garage-like door to catch their breaths.

"Squall...does he EVEN know where the auto class is?" asked Cloud. Unbeknownst to the two, at the mentioning of Leon's actual name, Tidus stuck his head around a random corner, shaking his fist threateningly and crying out in frustration before disappearing again.

Leon shrugged and took off his glasses. He wiped them with the hem of his shirt, put them back on, adjusted them, and turned to Cloud. Before he could say anything, he caught sight of a sign right behind the blond on the wall. Silently he pointed at it until Cloud finally took notice and turned around. Both boys stared at the sign that read 'Auto Shop' in gaping silence.

"...That could be it."

* * *

**Co-Authors' (End) Notes:**

RinRan: Hey baby...There's a 'U' in 'Us'. (wink wink)

Sambi: ...Yeah and there's also a 'U' in 'Urbanization'.

RinRan: ...I don't get it.

Sambi: It's really rather simple, I just killed your pick-up line

RinRan: But...I wasn't trying to pick up you...You're too heavy.

Sambi: Say that again and you're going home in a body bag.

RinRan: ...It's peanut-butter-jelly time! XD

Sambi: Just for the record...we're proof of the effects of long term chlorine exposure to the brain.


	4. The Birth of a Team BETTER than Football

**Co-Authors' Notes:** We've finally updated. Quit your whining.

RinRan: FINALLY! After long, excruciating hours...WE'VE FINALLY GIVEN BIRTH TO A LONG, HEALTHY CHAPTER!! MWUAHAHAHAHHAHA!!

Sambi: Yeah, then you went and dropped it on its head...Thanks a lot.

RinRan: No problem! That's just what the doctor had ordered! XD

Sambi: What doctor? I didn't see any doctors.

RinRan: ...Does listening to Zexion count?

Sambi: Why do I even bother...

RinRan: Maybe we should have tried House then, huh?

Sambi: House?! He's not much better than Zexion.

RinRan: ...Hey, just who was it who gave birth again?

Sambi: ...Let's not get into that...Let's just let these people read the chapter already. It's a long one after all.

RinRan: We made more Disney references! Try and catch 'em all! PO-KE-MON!!

* * *

**Chapter 3 : The Birth of a Team BETTER than Football**

* * *

After a long day of work, the first thing that came out of Cid Highwind's mouth when he saw the three seniors enter his class was, "What the fuck are ya doing in my class?! Do I even fucking know who ya are?! Ya all not my fucking students, I know that fucking much! Fuck!"

The three stared in shocked silence before Tidus spoke up, "We're...looking for Mr. Highwind?"

The disgruntled blond man hawked and spat at the floor, then replied gruffly, "I'm him. What can I do ya for?"

"Goddammit!" yelled Leon suddenly, slamming his fist into the wall nearby, "I'm sick of these pedophilic adults we call 'administrators'!" Both Cloud and Tidus backed away from the raging brunet slowly.

Cid blinked and turned to the two blonds. "What's his deal?" he asked.

Tidus shrugged and smiled. "Oh, nothing. It's just that everyone we've talked to today seems to think that we're a bunch of hookers."

"Well, sorry to disappoint ya all, but I don't swing that way," replied Cid, "now seriously-why the fuck are ya in my classroom?!"

Leon's eye twitched with annoyance as he explained, "We're here to ask you if you would be the coach of our new water polo team."

Cid held up a hand and inspected the dirt crusted under his fingernails. "...Give me one good reason why I should."

"You'll get more pay," the brunet replied, not missing a beat.

"No," replied the older man, still inspecting his nails.

"You'll be our coach for the genesis of our water polo program at this school-the first in history!" Tidus cried passionately as he threw up his arms for emphasis. If you listen closely, you could almost hear angels singing in the background.

"...Don't make me barf. Boys, I've been working for 15 fucking years at this miserable school. Why the hell should I start caring about the history of it now?"

"...I'm the spirit commissioner?"

"...No."

Meanwhile, Cloud thought and thought, trying to think of a convincing reason. After coming up with nothing, he desperately tried the first thing that came to his mind, "You can pick your own assistant coaches?"

Both Leon and Tidus quickly turned to their blond friend with looks that said, "Are you an idiot-that will never work!"

Cid finally looked up from his nails and asked, "ANYONE I want?"

The three stared at him in a mixture of amazement and shock. "...Sure." replied Cloud.

The older man stared at him with piercing blue eyes, analyzing this strange teenager with even stranger hair. He then smiled and held out his hand. "Congratulations, boys. Ya got yerself a coach."

Cloud smiled back and shook his hand.

--:--

The next day...

"_GOOOOOOOOOOOOD MORNING, T. T. HIGH!! I'M TIDUS NELSON AND THIS IS YOUR ANSEM REPORT FOR TUESDAY, AUGUST 25, OR OTHERWISE THE SECOND DAY OF SCHOOL FOR ALL YOU CLUELESS PEOPLE OUT THERE!"_

Yesterday, Cloud was cringing in his seat, fearful for what ever was to come out of the intercom. Today, on the other hand, he was excited beyond all measure and was at the edge of his seat, his ears hanging onto every word that was pouring out from Tidus' mouth. After all, it was the day of the big announcement.

"_Okay, so first thing first...To all you debtors out __there please report to the finance windows as soon as possible, or else Mr. McDuck will blow your brains out-"_

"_Tidus, this is the second day of school,"_ growled Ansem the Wise faintly in the background.

"_-JUST KIDDING, Mr. Ansem the Wise, sir. But seriously, if__ I were Mr. McDuck, I would be pretty pissed too at all those indebts the students have-"_

"_TIDUS..."_

"_Right! Moving on..."_

Cloud, along with the rest of his class, chuckled inwardly at the early morning antics between the school principal and the spirit commissioner/bulletin announcer. _But man, this sort of thing would get old fast if it were to continue on throughout the whole year, _he thought. Ah, the irony in that thought...

"_...As for all you__ football jocks out there, please report straight to Coach Mulan's class after school for a meeting; no need to dress! Huh, does that mean no clothes? Damn...And finally, here to sing our school's Alma mater...Jaaaaaaaack Skellington!"_

"...Huh?" said Cloud. _Where's the rest of the bulletin? _

There was a short feedback. Instead of Tidus' preppy voice, a male's voice-clear, loud, and powerful as it was beautiful-sang out:

"_Hail, Twilight Town High,_

_We let our shadows roam._

_Stuck between two phases,_

_Are we light or are we dark?_

_They say we have other halves-_

_We really shouldn't be._

_Nobodies fight now-_

_Reclaim! Our! Hearts!"_

_Huh, it's the same exact tune as Hallow Bastions'_, thought Cloud in wonder. However, cold dread ran through him when he suspected that the end of the bulletin was drawing near. _But, there's more...right?_

"_...Was amazing singing from our choir star, Jack Skellington! And that was your Ansem Report for the day. I'm Tidus Nelson, and have a tuh-riffic Tuesday, all you Nobodies!"_ With that, the intercom went off with a click.

Cloud sat in his seat, the cold dread settling in his stomach as his suspicion became reality. _No..._, he thought in despair. _No, no, NO! That can't be all!_

Ten minutes into the class, the intercom came on again and Tidus' voice blared out, _"Oops, sorry-my bad. I forgot to mention during this morning's announcement that we have started a brand new team here at T.T. High-MEN'S WATER POLO!! Sorry ladies, maybe next time. Eh, but you get to see a bunch of hot guys in Speedos! Anyways, anyone who's interested in joining, curious about the sport, or wanting to know what kind of sport could be better than football, please come by the pool deck after school today for a meeting."_ There was a long pause, and then a loud whining _"PLEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAASE!! Thank you."_ Then the intercom went off with feedback.

Cloud sighed in relief and turned to look at the rest of the class. He became uneasy when he noticed the murderous looks on the football players' faces. He chuckled weakly and then banged his head against his table. _I'm gonna kill that bastard_, he thought once again.

--:--

News traveled fast throughout Twilight Town High that day about the creation of the new water polo team. By lunch, everyone was talking about it. Some were positive comments:

"Oh, cool! A new team!"

"Yes! Guys in Speedos!!" (These are mostly girls, by the way. MOSTLY.)

And some were negative:

"Wait-what?! SPEEDOS?!"

"Only pansies wear Speedos!"

And some were just completely biased:

"Nothing could be better than FOOTBALL!"

"Shut up or I'll make you climb the pole during practice-with weights! Quit complaining like a baby!"

"Yes, Coach Mulan..."

At sixth period, our three seniors went to the pool deck to get some practice in before the meeting. When they got there, all they saw were the swim team, the swim coach, and a very tall red head lounging around in the bleachers. Not thinking anything about the strange red head, whom Cloud thought looked a bit familiar, the three proceeded to get ready for practice.

"So, you guys brought your gear, right?" Cloud asked, dumping his sport bag on the first row of the bleachers. Leon and Tidus did the same.

"Yep!" chirped Tidus happily. Excitement was clearly written on his face-as it was also on his friends. "Dude, I wish it was three already!"

"Keep your pants on, Tidus," muttered Leon, taking off his glasses and putting them neatly in its case. "We don't want to scare anyone off by having them walk in and see you in a Speedo."

Tidus scoffed. "What are you talking about? I have a very nice body!"

"What ever you say, Tidus," replied Leon curtly, "what ever you say."

The tan blond stuck out his tongue at the brunet. The three then proceeded to change, wrapping towels around their waists. Unbeknownst to them, shinny green eyes watch their every movement. They then heard whistling. Cloud, Leon, and Tidus turned their heads toward the only other person on the bleachers besides them.

"Damn, hot sun, sparkling cool water, and gorgeous blonds in Speedos," the red head sighed blissfully. "I must have died and gone to heaven."

It took Leon a few seconds to realize that the guy was none other than the school's Casanova. "Wait a sec, just who the hell are you exactly?!" he asked, his eye starting to twitch in irritation. "And why are you here in the first place?"

The red head smirked. "Name's Axel," he drawled, "got it memorized?" He then sat up, checking out the spiky-haired blond for a bit before continuing "And as for why I am here-" he turned dramatically to Leon and flashed a smile "-I'm the T.A."

There was a moment of silence, except for the splashing of the swim team in the background. "...O-kay..." replied Leon. He turned to Cloud and Tidus and muttered, "Let's just get into the pool. It's already 2:30."

"Crap, you're right!" exclaimed Tidus, throwing his towel onto the bleachers and taking out a massive bottle of sunscreen. "We don't have much time to practice before the meeting. Hey, Cloud, could you put this on my back?"

Cloud shook his head. "No time. Besides, one day without sunscreen won't kill you."

"That's a lie! My skin's sensitive!"

"You know, if you put that on now, it'll just wash off once you get in the water," Axel interjected unexpectedly. "It needs to be applied 20 minutes before you get in the water."

Tidus stared at him, and then turned to the bottle in his hand. "Oh." He tossed it onto his towel and grabbed a water polo ball from his bag. "Let's go!"

"...I'm not gonna even ask why you brought a ball," muttered Leon, before spring diving into the pool. Once he surfaced, he threw back his head in order to keep his long bangs out of his eyes and waved to Cloud. "Hurry up, man!" It was at that particular moment that the swim coach happened to look over to the random brunet in her pool and see his hair toss. She then looked back at her swimmers, shaking her head and pulling her long red hair into a ponytail, thinking, _"Amateur."_

Cloud and Tidus both jumped in and together the three swam a few laps before passing the ball around. (For those who don't know what water polo is or how it is played/practiced, the technicalities of the sport will be further elaborated on a later date. We just want to get on with the damn story right now.) Twenty five minutes later, Tidus motioned to the other two about the time and that they should be getting ready for the meeting. The three swam to the wall (aka, edge of the pool) and pulled themselves out (that's right-no ladders, bitches). It was at this time that Axel decided to remind them of his presence.

"Goddamn, I've been playing polo since I was like 5 and I've NEVER played you before," smirked the red head as Cloud walked over to his towel. "Trust me-I'd remember _that_ fine piece of ass."

Cloud turned and stared at him. "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!" This caught the attention of nearly everyone on the pool deck, especially Leon.

Axel, sensing the glare of the raging brunet, laughed nervously. "Well...um...I...heheh-"

Cloud cut him off with a raised hand. "You play water polo?" he whispered in awe.

Tidus poked Leon in the side and whispered, "He didn't even hear the second half of that statement, did he?"

"Nope," sighed Leon, almost wistfully, "he stopped listening after learning he plays water polo."

Tidus shrugged. "Thought so."

_Yes, he's definitely blond. He's so friggin' blond, it's not even funny_, thought Axel. _God, I love them blonds_. "Well, yeah, of course I play water polo. Why else would I be here, waiting for the meeting?"

"Wait-YOU'RE here for the meeting?" It was now Leon's turn to be shocked. He quickly stepped in between Cloud and Axel and glared at the red head. "Since when does the noble sport of water polo allow its players to be, well...players?!"

Axel scoffed. "What, you don't think Casanova liked playing water polo?"

"...Water polo didn't exist around Casanova's time-" started Tidus.

Axel and Leon cut him off with a, "That's not the point!" They then both glared at one another because of their perfect synchronization. Axel then continued offhandedly, "Besides, I'm only one type of player at a time. I never mix passion with pleasure-" he then flashed a smile "And water polo's my one true passion." If you squinted hard enough and turn you head at just the right angle, you could even see roses in the background.

Leon gritted his teeth in disgust, but then Cloud piped up, "So...what's your pleasure?"

The red head smirked. "I could show you later, if you like."

Before anyone had a chance to respond to that comment, the bell rang, signaling the end of school. Oddly enough, people started filing into the pool deck and taking seats on the bleachers immediately after the bell, which is humanly impossible for anyone to make it that fast. But whatever the reason is-_they just did._

After a group of about twenty to twenty-five people showed up, Cid finally graced the pool deck with his presence, followed by a young woman with slicked back, short blond hair who looked like she was no older than a sophomore in college. "Alright ya brats! Sit yer asses down and shut the hell up!" he yelled, oblivious to the fact that everyone was already seated quietly.

A young chubby freshman stood up and nervously said, "Um, sir...We already are sitting quietly."

The young woman shot a glance at him and sweetly smiled. "Oh, really now? So you're _not_ standing up, talking to us right now?" She said it in a voice so sickeningly sweet that it could have given everyone within earshot cavities. The boy stared at her with fearful wide eyes and quickly sat down. "That's what I thought."

Cid stuck a lit cigarette in his mouth and turned to face the group, who stared at him at shock. "Alright, first thing's first. If I'm gonna be the coach of this dang water polo team, there's a few rules that must be established." He then held up a finger menacingly. "One...Ya all shall call me 'Coach'. Not 'Cid'. Not 'Mr. Highwind'. And definitely not 'Coach Highwind'. It's 'Coach'."

Axel began to open his mouth when Cid turned to him and said, "And no, Axel-not 'Coach Cid' either." The red head snapped his fingers in defeat.

"Two-" he held up another finger, "no pansies on the team. This is a hard sport. Ya will be tired, ya will be hurting, and ya may even have a few broken bones. DEAL WITH IT. Do not come cryin' to me about being 'sick' or 'tired' or 'in pain'-I don't even care if yer having a friggin'period! Yer not gettin' out of practice! Got it?

"Third-" Cid paused, suddenly noticing two boys, one with silver hair and the other spiky brown, who appeared to be in their own little world. He walked up and towered over them. "Excuse me...am I not _interesting_ enough for ya?!" The two looked up at him.

The silver haired one replied, "No, we were paying full attention." He then added, "Coach."

"Oh, really now?" the blond woman asked sweetly, walking up to them as well. "Then if you were paying attention so well, why were you looking at him as opposed to my fa-...Coach?"

"Nice save on your Freudian slip there, Lark," came a new voice from her side. All the students turned in surprise to the owner of the voice. The newcomer was a short, slate-haired man who looked eerily similar to the school nurse.

The blond woman casually turned to the newcomer. "When did you get here, Zex?"

"Just now. I just finished 'fixing up' one of the students."

"Who ever let you be the school nurse must've been out of their mind," the woman commented, "or high."

"That's funny, coming from T.T.U.'s resident druggie."

"Hey, I resemble that remark!" she responded with fake hurt, "Besides, you're the one who gives them to me."

The slate-haired man raised an eyebrow. "'Resemble'?" he asked.

"Eh, can't resent something that's true."

Cid coughed conspicuously. "T.M.I, ya two. Now back to the matter at hand..."

"Oh, yes, about that. The brunet's Deaf," interjected 'Zex'. "The other's just interpreting for him."

The blond man blinked. "Is that so?" He turned to the two boys and shrugged. "Carry on. Now, where was I? Oh yeah...Third-" he then turned back to the rest of the group. "If ya think ya cannot handle this, leave now and I will not think of ya again. If ya do decide to stay and fail miserably, I will forever look down upon ya. Ca-peesh?" At that comment, over half the group stood up and left quickly, leaving only our three seniors, Axel, and five other people. Cid observed them and grunted. "Only nine, eh? 'Nough for a team." He then gestured to the part of the bleachers directly in front of him. "All of ya-sit over here." Everyone quickly shifted to the designated spot, much to their new coach's approval. "Not a bad bunch too. Alright, we're gonna start with ya in the far right corner, and we're gonna work our way forward in a zig-zag pattern. Yer gonna state yer name, yer grade, yer experience with water polo, and yer position if ya have one."

Tidus waved his hand. "Can we say something interesting about ourselves too?" he asked excitedly.

Cid looked at him and stated flatly, "No. I don't care about anything 'interesting' about any of ya. Now begin."

The first chosen victim stood up nervously. It was the chubby boy who had spoken out earlier. "Uh...Pence Rojas. Freshman. Uh...I've never played before, so...no experience nor position?"

Cid shook his head. "Next." Pence then sat down, and the next stood up.

"Hayner Smith. Freshman. No experience, no position."

Cid sighed and muttered, "Great, a bunch of newbies." He took a drag from his cigarette and called out, "Next!"

"Oh, uh...Riku Shinomura. Freshman. Uh...No polo experience. No position...but I've done swim team..."

Cid shrugged. "Eh, better than nothin'. Next."

It was the spiky-haired brunet's turn. However, Riku spoke for him. "Sora Nomura. Freshman. Six years. Mainly whole set, but can play utility."

Cid nodded and said, "Nice." Sora thumbed-up at him with a cheerful smile. "Next."

"O'Bedgood. Axel O'Bedgood. Junior. 11 years. Whole guard, got it memorized?"

Cid rolled his eyes. "Shut up, O'Bedgood." Axel stuck out his tongue and sat down. "Next."

"Wakka...Hula. Senior. No experience or position, but I've played soccer..."

"Is this soccer? No, I didn't think so," interject 'Lark'. She then yelled out, "Next!"

"Tidus Nelson! Senior! Nine years! Goalie or utility! And I'm the-"

"NEXT!"

"...Do I have to say my first name?" asked Leon exasperatedly.

"Do you prefer a _different_ name?" asked 'Zex', giving him a cold stare from the one eye that wasn't covered by his bangs.

"...As a matter-of-fact, yes. Yes, I do."

"Oh. Okay then, just use whatever," the man replied offhandedly.

"Thank you. It's Leon...Leonhart. Senior. 11 years. Utility or whole guard."

Axel began, "Hey-"

"Nice. Next!" cut in Cid.

Cloud turned to Leon in confusion. "Hey, I thought your first name was 'Squall'." Leon stared blankly into the blond's face.

"You weren't paying attention, were you?"

"Paying attention to what?"

"...Never mind. It's your turn."

"Oh!" Cloud stood up. "Cloud Strife. Senior. 11 years. Utility, though I can play whole set."

_Oh, yeah,_ thought Axel happily, _O'Bedgood's gonna get some._

Cid smiled and nodded. "Good. We're not all newbies. Now, as I've said before-" he pointed to himself, "I am yer coach, Cid Highwind. I've played for eight years and I can and have played every position." He then turned to and told the other two next to him, "Introduce yourselves."

The blond woman went first, her green eyes glaring at them coldly. "I'm your assistant coach, Larxene Highwind." The fake sweetness was gone from her voice. "But you will call me 'Larxene'-and ONLY 'Larxene'. I am a senior at Twilight Town University. I've have played since I was...10. I play any position except for goalie and was sprinter."

The slate-haired man went next. He flipped his bangs coolly and said nonchalantly, "Zexion Ienzo. Assisstant coach and team manager. Graduate student at T.T.U. Let's just say I've played for...15 years. Yeah, that sounds about right. Utility. Oh, and yes, I am the school nurse, in case you're wondering. Physicals are due by next Friday...you may want to write that down in your planners or something."

"Alright, intros' over," said Cid. He dropped the long-since dead cigarette and stomped on it out of habit. "Since I doubt ya all have yer suits, I'll let ya off today. Tomorrow, meet at my class-that's the AUTO ROOM, for those who don't know-at 3:15, and I expect ya to have suits and towels by then. We'll be going over some things in class then be gettin' in the pool. Got that?"

Everyone nodded. "Good. Now scram!"

TO BE CONTINUED . . .

* * *

OMAKE (After Thought):

As everyone filed out of the pool deck, Cloud, Leon, and Tidus were still gathering their stuff and getting dressed. "I really don't see the point of postponing practice for everyone," grumbled the suntanned blond. "We already have our suits on and everything! I even have a ball!"

"Just get dressed," Leon muttered. He put on his glasses and turned to Cloud, who appeared to be lost in thought. "What's up?"

Cloud frowned. "I was just thinking...Do you think that Larxene is actually RELATED to Cid? They do have the same last name after all."

"Uh, I wouldn't be surprised if she was his daughter," replied Leon. "They have the same attitude and they do look alike."

"Really?" exclaimed Cloud.

Tidus scrunched up his face. "Ewww...That would mean Cid has to be MARRIED!"

Cloud was lost in thought again. "But...That can't be true. Larxene seemed so much...sweeter than him. And cuter too." He then smiled dreamily, causing Leon to stare at him in shock.

"C-Cloud...Do you...Are you saying that you...l-like...her?!"

Cloud beamed at Leon. "Yeah...She's pretty!" he replied in a dreamy, sing-song voice. Leon's face dropped and it looked like he was going to hurl. He then grabbed his stuff and quickly left without a word.

Tidus stared thoughtfully at his two friends' strange reactions. "Interesting..."

--

That night, Leon didn't get much sleep, as Cloud's words kept replaying over and over in his mind. _Oh, the horror! Cloud-how could you?!_

* * *

**Co-Authors' (End) Notes:**

Sambi: Yay!! We have a team! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

RinRan: Hooray! Now we can have relentless amounts of sexual innuendos and tension!!

Sambi: Somehow, I knew you were gonna say that...but yes, it is true, we can.

RinRan: I rather liked this chapter, didn't you? Especially the personal touch of Axel's last name...See people? Working as a file clerk for a chiropractor does have its perks!

Sambi: Oh yes it does. Just wait until we learn Roxas' last name-yes he is in this story too- IT'S FUN!!

RinRan: Oh yes it is. And yeah, Sora's Deaf. Poor perky Sora...he can't talk!...Well, he can, just not clearly...In the words of M. Night Shamaylan: "What a twist!"

Sambi: Trust us folks it is possible to have a Deaf water polo player, our team had two. On another note, as stated earlier, all confusion about water polo: its terms, how its played, etc. will be cleared up in later chapters- most of it in the next one- so fear not.

RinRan: I drew a squirrel. It goes PEEP.

...PEEP.


	5. Water Polo 101 Sort of

**Co-Authors' Notes:** Please do not use this as an actual guide on how to play polo...

Sambi: To all our faithful readers who are very confused about the technicalities of water polo, here's the first of many explainations.

RinRan: If you just want to understand and get it over with, there's always Wikipedia. Otherwise, go see a water polo game live (go Beijing 2008!), or-better yet-join a team!

Sambi: Also in case there was some confusion, Sora is not a Deaf-Mute, he is just Deaf. He can speak, it is just not always understandable, so he prefers not to at times.

RinRan: Besides, would you really want to distort Sora's voice? Or try to READ the distorted voice? Yeah, that's what I thought...Anyways, kudos to those of you reviewers who pointed out some rather interesting stuff about the characters that even WE didn't know! Or consider. But the pop culture references on the other hand...

Sambi: We're still waiting to see if someone can get them all...happy hunting!

RinRan: Remember kids-there's a special prize in every box, so feel free to collect them all. No purchase is necessary.

Sambi: Now let the explaination BEGIN!!

* * *

**Chapter 4 : Water Polo 101...Sort of**

* * *

At 3:15 in the auto room that Wednesday (aka the next day, for all of you who had forgotten Tidus' super special awesome bulletin in the previous chapter), the team lost their sense of smell, thanks to the stench of oil and gasoline. Actually, that is a lie.

It was all the tuna's doing.

"What?" asked Hayner contemptuously. "I'm hungry." He then took another humongous bite out of his sandwich and talked again, much to the team's dismay. "So, where's Coach anyways? You'd think the guy would actually be here since this is his own room."

"Down in the garage, where else do you think an auto teacher would be?" answered Riku, crinkling his nose from the fishy smell and also in equal contempt.

"Well, he COULD have gone to the bathroom, you know, or went to the teacher's lounge, or-" At that exact moment, they heard a long bang and cursing from down below. "...You win this round, Shinomura..."

"Ack! Fuck! Damn it, Rikku, I said not yet! Don't press the fucking pedal until I say 'Go'!" There was another loud bang and more cursing. "Damn it, ya dumb broad!"

Everyone looked wide-eyed at Riku, whose face grew red with embarrassment. "Coach!" he yelled, "What the fuck are you yelling at me for?! Just because I like my hair long it doesn't make me a girl!"

There was a pause, before Cid yelled back, "Who the fuck's up there?! Rikku, check it out!"

The team heard yet another loud bang, more cursings, and then the sound of pounding coming up the stairs. A slightly tan, blond girl in an outfit that just barely met dress code appeared at the top of the stairs, panting to catch her breath. She then noticed the group of stunned boys and then smiled brightly to them. "Hi!" she greeted with enough enthusiasm to rival Tidus. She then turned around and yelled down to the garage, "It's a bunch of hot guys with gym bags!"

"What the hell?! This isn't the gym! What the fuck are they doing in my fucking room?!"

The girl nodded and then turned back to the boys with the same brilliant smile. "So, um, why are you guys here?"

The team looked at one another in stunned silence, before Axel sighed and sauntered over to the girl. "Hey, Rikku. Let me handle this, 'kay babe?" Rikku giggled and moved out of the way, allowing Axel to have clear access to the stairs. He then took a deep breath and yelled out, "Coach fucking Cid! We're here for the meeting like you told us to, remember ya old fart!" A loud exclamation was heard from down below. Axel sauntered back to his seat among the boys, saying to Rikku as he passed by, "Thanks, babe."

"No problem, Axel. Later taters!" Rikku then smiled again at the boys and left the room through the classroom door.

Before the team could react in any way about what the hell had just happen, Cid appeared at the top of the stairs, files in one hand and a screw diver in the other. "Alright, sit down, shut up, and let's get this meeting over with."

Pence cleared his throat, preparing to point out the obvious again. "Uh, Coach-"

"Shut up. And where the hell are-" The door then opened, and Larxene and Zexion walked in. "Oh. There they are. Okay, let's get this over with-again." Cid took a drag and looked at Zexion expectantly, who then rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically.

"Fine, I'll do it." He sighed again. "So...Water polo is a team sport consisting of two teams of seven people playing at a time. That's fourteen people total in the pool, if that's too hard to figure out. Each team consists of six field players and one goalie."

"So, it's like soccer, yeah?" questioned Wakka with a smile.

Zexion stared at him coldly until the smile faded away into nothing before replying, "Sure. Why not? But instead of field players only being able to use their feet, in polo, they can only touch the ball with one hand at a time, while the goalie can use two hands."

Wakka grinned again. "So it IS like soccer!"

"No, not at all. The only similarities are the parts I've just mentioned. Everything else is completely different. Although the points are counted the same; one goal equals one point. But that's the same in hockey too. Everyone following? Good. Speaking of hockey...players can get kicked out a game for short periods of time if they commit a major foul, much like going to a penalty box, but for not as long."

A hand came up from within the group. Zexion nodded and Hayner stood up, asking, "Um, what's a foul?" All those who had played water polo before laughed, much to the dirty blond's embarrassment and annoyance.

Zexion looked to the experienced players. "Who wants to take this? Tidus?"

"Very common in water polo!" chirped the tanned blond senior. "There are three different types: ordinary, exclusion, and penalty. Ordinary fouls are-"

"Look, freshman," interrupted Axel, as he slung an arm around Hayner, since he was sitting beside him, much to the younger teen's discomfort, "all you need to know is this: ordinary fouls-first, they're just known as 'fouls'. Second, they happen all the time and are no big deal. They either result in a turn over, which means the other team then gets the ball, or a free pass. For exclusions, or more commonly known as an 'ejection', you're basically a loser who gets sent to the quote-unquote penalty box for 20 seconds, leaving your team with one less player than the other team. They have to work their ass off just because of YOUR stupid mistake. And finally, penalty foul, or the 5-Meter...You get one of these you're a failure to the whole team. Why? Because you let the other team have a friggin' free shot, like free throws in basketball! Oh, and if you get a total of three ejections and/or 5-Meters, you're kicked out of the whole game! Way to go, reject! Got it memorized?"

"...Okay?" answered Hayner. "And can you please let go of me? You're kind of creeping me out."

"Glad to," replied Axel, scooting away, "since you're not my type. THIS one, on the other hand..." The red head scooted his chair closer towards Cloud, who was sitting just on the other side of him. Suddenly, he stopped when he felt a death glare upon him and heard a low growl coming from the other side of the spiky-haired blond. Axel rolled his eyes and leaned back in his chair, denied yet again.

Zexion coughed, turning everyone's attention back to him. "Thank you, O'Bedgood for your _insightful_ definition of fouls...I think. Any questions? Good. Let's continue. Now let's discuss the positions in the game. On offense, there's a hole set, a point, two flats, and two wings. When on defense, there's a set guard, a point guard, other defenders for the opposing flats and wings, and-last but not least-the goalie. We'll get into further detail of these positions once we get into the water."

"Look, you faggots," interjected Larxene, who by this point was getting tired of Zexion's tedious explanations, "there are really only three things you need to remember. First-" she held up a finger for emphasis "-you must constantly be treading water and are never allowed to touch the ground. This is an A-QUA-TIC sport; there is no LAND or FLOOR. Second-there will be a LOT of swimming. You will be swimming back and forth, up and down the pool. The only thing that makes this different from a swim meet is that there is a big, yellow ball floating in the middle of the pool. And that you could touch other people. I'm sure half of you signed up for this sport simply because of that. And finally, three-anything underwater-and half the things above it-is _fair game_. And I mean ANYTHING. If the referees didn't see it, it didn't happen. No complaining about what the other team did to you. Basically, boys: what happens in the pool, stays in the pool. Capeesh?"

"Yes, ma'am," came the unison reply. In most of the boys' mind, however, was the true unheard response: _Yes, bitch._

Larxene's eyes flared at the response. "NEVER CALL ME 'MA'AM'!" she nearly screamed. The team cowered back and could've sworn that they saw sparks jumping from one of her antennae-like hair strands to the other.

"Okay, Larxene," was the weak reply. _Scary bitch_, they thought again.

She then immediately calmed down and gave them all a sweet smile. "Thank you!"

Cid sighed and heaved himself out of his chair. He then clasped his hands together and looked at everyone. "Alright, now that this crappy meeting is finally over with, let's get in the fucking pool before it's too late. We only have-" He checked the time on his wristwatch and swore. "Fuck! It's already five?!" Cid shrugged to his boys. "Looks like we're not getting in today...again. Be at the pool dressed and ready by 3:15 tomorrow and have your rides pick ya up no later than 5:15. I don't want to have to wait around all night for ya damn ride. Got it? Good. Now SCRAM!"

TO BE CONTINUED . . .

* * *

OMAKE (After Thought):

As the last of the boys filed out, Cloud decided to remain seated where he was. Zexion left as well, while Cid went back down stairs to work on his car some more, leaving just our blond senior and Larxene in the room.

This was his chance; he's been thinking about it all last night and all of today, and he's finally going to go for it. Cloud could not help but smirk at his plan of action-it was foolproof! Of course...this IS Cloud we're talking about...

He approached the girl, his heart racing against his will. This is it-this is the moment! "Uh...Larxene?" he asked, nervousness almost undetectable in his voice.

Larxene turned around and raised an eyebrow, as if she wasn't expecting him to still be there. "What can I do you for?" she asked.

Cloud was momentarily taken aback, but being the fourth time he heard that question this week, he was able to recover quickly. "Well, isn't that a bit rushing it? I mean, maybe we could start with, you know-a nice dinner, maybe a few movies...Then we'll get into that."

There was a momentary silence. Larxene blinked at him a few times, registering what was just said. She then smiled coyly. "That is, perhaps, the _best_ response I've _ever_ heard to that line...You've just earn yourself a date!"

At this moment, Leon opened the door, looking to see what was taking Cloud so long. He only caught the last part of what Larxene had said about a date.

Cloud smiled back. "So...Friday at 8?"

"Looking forward to it."

Leon waited a few moments in silence, then closed the door quietly and walked away. _She SO doesn't deserve him_, he thought sullenly, kicking a trashcan as he passed by.

* * *

**Co-Authors' (End) Notes:**

RinRan: We did it. We've ACTUALLY gone and done it. We've...INTRODUCED ANOTHER FEMALE CHARACTER!! Dun Dun DUUUUUNNNNN!!

Sambi: ...That's not what I thought you were gonna say... I was thinking you were gonna talk about how, yes, we DID just give Cloud a date...with LARXENE!!

RinRan: ...That too. By the way, folks...This is only the third day. Damn, Cloud sure works fast. (wink wink)

Sambi: ...Anyways in the immortal words of EVERY OTHER author...R&R...Yes, yes I did just do that.

RinRan: What? 'Rest and Relaxation'? 'Cause I would TOTALLY be on board with that. XD

Sambi: Yeah...We'll go with that.

RinRan: By the way, ya'll should be reading these notes. They're useful and helpful, and they may even get you up a hundred points on the SAT. That's how useful our discussions are!

Sambi: Yeah, like, 9.99 percent of the time.

RinRan: Right round. Like a record, baby. Right round. Round round.


End file.
